The Happy Prince

by Oscar Wilde

High above the city, on a tall column, stood the statue of the Happy Prince. He was gilded all over with thin leaves of fine gold, for eyes he had two bright sapphires, and a large red ruby glowed on his sword-hilt.

He was very much admired indeed. “He is as beautiful as a weathercock,” remarked one of the Town Councillors who wished to gain a reputation for having artistic tastes; “only not quite so useful,” he added, fearing lest people should think him unpractical, which he really was not.

Joke about a Bed

Peter goes to a doctor, “Doctor, I have a problem,” he says.

“When I sleep in my bed, I think that there is somebody under my bed. I look under my bed and I think there is somebody on my bed. On, under, on, under. I think that I am crazy!”

The doctor thinks for one minute. Then he says, “Come to me for 2 years. Come here three times in a week and I will help you.”

“How much will I pay?” Peter asks.

“One hundred dollars for a visit,” the doctor says.

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More than 100 passengers got on the plane. It was a winter day. It was January. The weather was very cold. It was snowing. Ice was on the roads. But the airport was open. The big jets were flying. A little snow never stopped a big jet. Big jets fly all the time. They rarely crash in bad weather. They rarely crash in good weather. Big jets are very safe. The passengers got on the plane. It was 7 a.m. The plane was supposed to take off at 7:30 a.m. It did not take off at 7:30 a.m. It did not take off all morning.